can you whisper
by abbyli
Summary: From the moment that Ned brought that boy home, he would surprise her. Even when she was perfectly horrible to that innocent boy, he would give her own children, his siblings so much love and protection. His good heart never waned and her disdain eased as they both grew in many ways.


She had hated him.

No that wasn't true. She never hated him.

She hated what he was.

The boy was a living lie.

If her husband had just told her the truth she would have had time to process and work her way past it but he had hidden the boy from her for fifteen months. Fifteen months! That is not an easy lie to forgive.

Catelyn Tully had been seven months carrying her Robb when Ned had brought the dark haired toddler into her home. He had informed her that his mother had been killed in an automobile accident and they were all he had now. He had tried to leave it at that but even though she was bedridden, Catelyn still demanded the truth. The discovery that she was not about to give Ned his first child stunned her and when the toddler had tried to greet her, she turned him away.

She could endure Ned's disappointed looks. She didn't care. Her Ned had lied to her for ever a year. He had allowed her to go on thinking that she was about to give him his first son and all the time he had had a son.

The boy was a good boy. He was quiet and kind, and doted on baby Robb. She often found him staring at his infant sibling in his crib. The first time she had seen the young lad by the cradle, she had shooed him away but he kept coming back, just wanting to look at him. To watch the infant sleep. So she gave up her efforts and let him near but never left him alone.

Sansa came along two years later and her Robb was just beginning to walk. He would follow Jon around like a puppy and Catelyn could not quench her fear that Jon would lead her boy into trouble. She never anticipated that it would be the other way around.

Both boys were quite protective of their sister. When she gave them a second sister, she almost found herself thinking - this is perfect. Two boys and two girls. From the outside the family looked complete. But it wasn't.

Others that looked in spoke about the rumors that surrounded the sudden oldest son in their household. She ignored those rumors but when they escalated, she took it out on the now nine year old child. She was carrying her going to youngest, Rickon, and was far healthier with this pregnancy than she was with her others. Jon had just come home from school with Robb in tow and both of them were sporting bloody noses.

She had flown at Robb and dragged him off to get cleaned up. When Robb told her that there was a fight at the school.

Catelyn immediately assumed Jon had started it and dragged Rob with him. She had grabbed onto the child by the arms, shaking him and not letting him get a word in edgewise and ignoring Robb's protests until Ned's booming voice stopped her.

"I started the fight, Mama!" Robb was sobbing. "Jonny was trying to get me to stop and he got hit too!"

Her hands fell away from Jon's slim arms like she had been burned, staring at the now silent boy in horror. Ned kissed Robb's head and sent him off to his room, lightly beckoning Jon to do the same.

"What did I just do?" she asked her husband once the children were gone. She could hear Bran wailing in his crib but did nothing. "What did I do to that boy?"

Ned watched her in silence for a moment before heaving a sigh, leaving the room too to go to Bran.

-;

"Would you like to hold your brother?"

Jon raises a surprised brow before nodding, sitting down on the side of the bed to accept his newborn sibling. Ned murmured soft instructions to the ten year old as he placed the cooing babe in his arms. Catelyn watched from her spot on the pillows, hiding a small smile at how at ease the older boy looked holding his brother.

His brother.

She would never deny that again.

-;

At fifteen her Sansa began seeing an older boy that spoke gruffly to her. Catelyn was not sure she could approve of this relationship, especially after learning the boy's name. Lannister.

The Lannisters were a very powerful and cruel family that lived on the other side of the town. The father and the older daughter should have been in prison ages ago but money and secrets kept them out. Sansa had begun seeing Joffrey, the daughter's oldest son and both she and Ned were immediately worried.

When Sansa came home sporting a black eye and a bloody lip, she didn't notice right away that Jon had disappeared. When Robb followed soon after, then she realized where the boys had gone.

Her seventeen year old came home around midnight, both of his eyes blackened. Jon had not injuries she could see but he carried himself stiffly. Ned inspected both of them while asking no questions and discovered Jon had a broken rib. He took Jon to the A&E while she waited at home, easing Sansa to sleep and softly lecturing Robb, who hadn't spoken a word since coming home.

She saw Joffrey the following day when she and Ned took Sansa and the other children to school personally. The boy was leaving the administrator's office with his mother and his face looked like ground meat. Catelyn found down the surge of pride for her boys when she saw the damage. She was a lady, she best not think like that but damn.

Cersei Lannister Baratheon did not say anything when she saw her, but gave her the coldest look imaginable. Catelyn couldn't help herself and returned that look with a smile, one with teeth and she could hear Ned tutting like a pigeon behind her but didn't care.

The administrator told her and Ned that he had taken Joffery out of the school and Robb and Jon would both be dismissed as well because the fight had happened on school grounds. No police charges would be given which was a relief.

"Mr. and Mrs. Stark, I am going easy on your sons," the administrator said to them. His eyes darted to her. "Because I did not see the fight begin, I cannot say 'who started it'," he adds. "But I do understand what happened and what led to it. So the best thing to do is to have your sons dismissed as well as Mr. Baratheon."

"I understand," Ned says, nodding his head. "Thank you for not involving the police."

"I will probably get shot for saying this but -" the other man chooses his words carefully. "I always could not stand Joffrey. He's a pain in the ass and so rude to his teachers. Your boys gave him what he deserved. I am just sorry that your girl had to suffer because of it."

"We are too," Catelyn agrees. She exchanges a glance with Ned and he nods. "Take all of our children off of the roster then."

"Excuse me?"

"They will finish out the semester, we are a week away from the end, correct?" The man nods. "Once they are done then they are not coming back. I do not want my children spread all over the city."

Ned's staring at her in surprise but she ignores him. Her children.

Her children.

-;

The children are admitted at a public school closer to their townhouse that they are much happier in. Jon graduates in the spring with honors and a scholarship into the best university in the state. Catelyn cordially congratulates him with she learns of the news, fighting back the rising pride in her belly when she sees this.

She isn't supposed to be happy for him. She's not.

She is not.

-;

At the age of twenty, Jon makes her husband a grandfather.

She should have known. History was repeating itself within their lineage. Jon didn't deny his son and his girlfriend, Ygritte, did not deny it either. The firehaired girl was finishing up college and she was just days away from giving birth to their own boy when she graduated from the university.

She held her husband's grandson once before handing him back to his father. He was a beautiful child, she angrily admitted, who looked like his father but had his mother's eyes and probably the same temperament. This Ygritte that she had only come in contact with twice was loud and brash but Jon was so head over heels for her. She knew he had met his end with this woman.

The tiny babe had gazed up at her with an almost interest when she had held him. Dark curls strayed all over his head and his eyes were almost narrowed, like he could see right through her hard exterior. Catelyn fought the feelings within her and handed him back to his father before leaving the room to find the breath that she lost.

-;

The boy, now known as Neal, was running all over her house. His aunts Arya and Sansa were chasing him, both carrying tiny ridiculous sweaters that they had wanted to try on him and to be frank, Catelyn was rooting for the boy.

She was sitting in the common room when a blur of a boy came dashing into the room. "Hide me, Grandma!"

Catelyn nearly chokes.

She points to the back of her wingback chair and he looks at her gratefully before diving behind her onto the seat. He was small enough that her frame encompassed him when she perched on the edge and his aunts did not see him when they entered the room.

"Mama, have you seen Neal?"

Catelyn shakes her head. "No I have not. Maybe he's in the kitchen?"

"Probably getting into the chocolate cake again with Papa," Sansa nudges her sister. She still grips that ridiculous sweater. "Let's go." The two disappear and Neal stands up, lightly jumping down onto the floor.

"Thank you," the boy says. "Those sweaters were ugly."

Catelyn laughs, her eyes raking over him. He looked so much like his father and his grandfather. He carried his mother's wild spirit though and she knew this boy would live a full life. It was all she could hope for him.

"Your aunts should have left the kitchen by now. Why don't we go down and have some of that cake?" Catelyn offers him her hand and the small boy happily takes it.

-;

Jon finds them there in the kitchen later.

"Neal, I hope you were not bothering Catelyn," Jon gently admonishes his son, wiping the chocolate cake crumbs that were smeared across his chubby cheeks.

"Not at all," Catelyn says, taking the plate from in front of Neal and placing it in the sink. "We were having a lovely time."

Jon stares at her in surprise before lightly ushering Neal from the room. "Sweetheart, go find your things. It's time to go home."

"Okay papa."

The boy runs from the room, his feet thudding on the hardwood floor. The sounds of his footsteps fade before Jon turns to her.

"I'm sorry, Sansa and Arya told me they would care for him."

"They were," Catelyn says, turning on the water in the sink. "But they were trying to force some absolutely despicable sweaters on the poor lad and so I said I would give him some sanctuary."

Jon cracks a smile. "I remember them doing that to Rickon. He will never wear anything that doesn't have a zipper on the front of the jacket. Easy escape he calls it."

Catelyn laughs at the memory. "Yes, that's true." Jon shares the laugh with her for a brief moment before they both fall silent.

Neal runs into the room then, carrying a bag and his teddy bear tucked underneath his arm. "Ready to go!"

Jon leans down to scoop him up but Neal stops, quickly dashing over to Catelyn and throwing his arms around her legs in a clumsy hug. "Bye Grandma! I had fun today!"

Catelyn freezes. She sees Jon staring at her and Neal in surprise and she swallows the rising lump in her throat. She pats Neal on the head and gently brushing his wild curls back from his forehead.

"Yes, uh, me too Neal."

The boy releases her and takes his father's hand. Jon casts her one more glance before they leave.

-;

She isn't surprised to find Jon on her doorstep later that night after everyone else has retired to bed.

She welcomes him in, gently brushing the fresh snowflakes from his shoulders as he walks past. She offers him tea to which he accepts and they spend an awkward five minutes in the kitchen where she had been spending some lovely time with Neal just hours before.

Placing the mug of steaming liquid in front of him, she settles with one of her own, warming her chilled hands on the sides. Jon sips gingerly at his mug, constantly worrying his bottom lip as he searches for words to say.

"You needn't worry about your son being around me, Jon."

Jon swallows, setting the mug on the table. "I don't, Catelyn," he responds dryly.

"Then why are you here? It's nearly one in the am, child."

The young man scoffs, taking another sip before he fixes his eyes on a crack on the table. "I wanted to ask you to forgive me."

Catelyn nearly drops her mug. "Me...forgive you?"

"I should have tried harder," Jon says. "To be a better son. To be a better protector to my siblings but - but Robb still got injured and Sansa was still abused and I know that those were my fault and -"

Her hand on his stops his tirade. "Don't you dare blame yourself for those. They were not your fault." At Jon's expression, she swallows. "I never should have touched you when you were just protecting your brother. I never should have laid a finger on you and I am so sorry. So sorry."

Jon places his other hand on top of hers.

"Your son," Catelyn says, licking her lips. "He is an angelic sight. He carries so much love in that heart of his and he - oh he is so wonderful. I would love to spend more time with him. If you let me. I understand if you do not."

"Bollocks," Jon says. "You can spend all the time with him you want." He smiles. "He looks like me but he is just like his mum. He tries to bullshit her but she doesn't put up with any of it. They are thick as thieves, the two of them."

Catelyn grins but the smile fades. "We should have been too."

"Catelyn -"

"I am so proud of you, Jon," she cuts in. Jon's eyes widen. "You are such a good man and even after everything I had done to you...I am so sorry." This apology is different from the others that had passed her lips.

Something has finally changed between them.

And this is good.

Jon's hands hold both of hers tightly. His dark eyes, warm with gentleness take hers and she allows herself a smile too.

"I forgive you."

Her heart nearly stutters to a stop at those words. "Wh-what?"

"On one condition. Actually two."

Oh.

"You throw Neal's fifth birthday party."

Catelyn laughs waterly, stunned at the sudden tears in her eyes. "What's the other one?"

Jon pulls a sleek white envelope from his jacket pocket and places it in front of her. She opens it up and holds the thick white paper in her hands, her eyes taking in the gold lettering.

 _You, Catelyn Stark, are cordially invited to the upcoming nuptials of Jon Snow and Ygritte Wilding._

More stubborn tears streak her cheeks, falling onto the invitation. "Are you sure?" she asks of him, swiping at the tears. Jon hands her the tissue box and she takes probably about twenty of them. "Are you sure you want me there?"

Jon nods. "Always."

Catelyn bites back a sob, stuffing the invitation back into the envelope before she weeps all over it. "You deserve better than I have given you, Jon Snow. You shouldn't want me there."

Jon's voice is firm but gentle. "But I do." He rises then and picks up his coat from the chair beside them. "Do you want to return your RSVP via the mail or give it to me now?"

She grins. "I will be there. As long as you want me."

Jon doesn't respond to that again. A smile graces his lips and he nods. "Good night Catelyn."

"Good night...Jon."

He's gone then, disappearing into the snowy night.

It is a beautiful autumn day.

Her daughters march down the aisle in matching rose gowns, carrying bouquets of orchids as they join their brothers at the alter. Ygritte had barely any family and she had asked Robb to escort her down the aisle. After five minutes of blushing, Robb had agreed and she turned her head now to see a beaming Robb escorting the bride down the leaf covered aisle.

The wedding was outdoors. The trees were ablaze with color and a warm breeze filled the air. The bridesmaids' hair were whipping in the wind but they didn't care. Catelyn felt Ned's large hand on her own and she squeezed, smiling as the bride in green met her future husband at the end of the aisle. She kissed Robb on the cheek and he had scurried off to take his seat next to his own bride to be.

The ceremony itself took about five minutes. The star of it was Neal, decked out in a dapper little suit and his hair slicked back from his forehead. He passed the rings over to his mother and father, almost bouncing on his feet as he did. She had never seen him so happy.

The only one that seemed happier was Jon. She could see the slight shake of his fingers when he took the simple silver band from his son, sliding it up onto Ygritte's hand. She does the same and they are pronounced husband and wife in front of their families and God.

Another heavy breeze flies through and a shower of golden leaves dance about on the newly married couple. Jon breaks away from his new wife only to pick up their son and hold him between them, the guests getting to their feet to applaud.

Before they leave, Jon stops to embrace his father and to her surprise, he wraps his arms around her too.

"Thank you," he whispers in her ear before releasing her. Catelyn can only stare after the man that is called Jon Snow as he walks off to be with his family.

She wonders if she is a part of it now.


End file.
